ROFL

Seriously. That's where we have got to in this current routine.

We get down to the floor. We snake about a bit. We roll over indolently. We open and shut legs like pairs of snippety fleshy scissors. And then we get up again.

Or not.



Actually, when we do reach the point where we teach the move we have designed for getting elegantly to the feet again, our troupe will look lovely. We're not at that part yet and so, each time we practise doing the floor rolling, our showgirls then have to get to their feet any old how so they are ready to practise getting down on the floor and rolling about again.

Hence the laughter in the "ROFL"above ... and the groaning. And the "oooh, me knees". And the swearing. And the clambering back up the chair as if hauling oneself up a mountain. Elegant? No. Entertaining? Oh yes.

Currently we could take this one on the road, performing at homes for the elderly. I think they would recognise the moves... if not the accompanying instructions to: "shut yer legs!"

It's a positive tonic dancing with our lot every week, it really is.

Yours, on half-term,

Burlicious x

A new move a day keeps the doctor away

The body is a mysterious thing. It's particularly puzzling when you ask it to do something new.

It's fair to say that, in our day-to-day life, there isn't much call for what we Burlicious three refer to as "tit rotations". This is not the twirling with tassels of the stripping burlesque performer. This is a drawing of a horizontal circle with the ribs - front, side, back, side - with the tits perkily leading the way, with emphasis in one particular direction to the beat, and with the lower half of the body still.

Coming to grips with it is a hilarious process.

Looking around the troupe as it test drove this move initially last night, there were showgirls with jaws and chin unconsciously following the same circular motion as the chest; showgirls staring  down in utter concentration and perplexity at their own tits, wondering how to get them started; showgirls lurching dangerously from side to side... and behind them all was the Voluptuous Jules, whose own marvellous bazoom punched emphatic circles all by itself as if the rest of her body were not involved.

An utter delight, Dear Reader, an utter delight.

And this was before we got down on all fours for the "low shoulders arse waggle" - oh yes.

Still, they say that new stuff is good for the brain!

Yours, positively brimming with mental sharpness,

Burlicious x