Bum roll, please

"Ta da da da DA" - goes the music.

Right left right left RIGHT - is what a curvaceousness of bums should be doing as the troupe is bent over, flat back, straight legs, posterior to the audience.

Yeah.

Except that the music is really quite fast.

And distinguishing right from left isn't everybody's strength.

So the whole thing at this early stage of learning the routine is currently, shall we say, a little more freestyle than it is intended to be?

On the other hand, the hat management at the start of the routine is looking fab - crisp, calm, collected. We love it when a plan comes together, we really do.

No class next week, Showgirls, so we'll next see you for speed bum waggling on 5th June.

Yours, happy in our wagglin',

Burlicious x

A triumphant finale

Teaching of the current routine has come to a close. Last night we brought to a delicious Burlicious climax the work of many weeks.

We twirled on our posterior. We flashed the full midwife. We cracked gloves to attention. We snaked legs open. We snapped them shut. We straddled chairs, turned chairs, caressed chairs, slithered off chairs and flopped over chairs. 

Ungratefully, a chair or two paid back all this loving attention by ripping showgirl tights to shreds, but that's chairs for you. Disloyal.

And, our less than perfect hall floor did manage to deliver a few splinters. As one of our beauties remarked: "There's nothing like finishing a Wednesday evening with small pricks in your hands." 

Indeed.

So, showgirls, next week a new routine. Hats and gloves, girls, in the very best tradition of Miss Jean Brodie.

Yours, preparing for the next little gem of a routine,

Burlicious x